Bumper Stickers and Road Signs

I mentioned Saturday I'd seen a new bumper sticker (Save the Ta-Tas). Great one for Breast Cancer Awareness. Thought I'd list a few others I've recorded over the past few years.

• WARNING! DRIVER UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF CHILDREN
• HANG UP AND DRIVE
• WAG MORE - BARK LESS
• I BRAKE FOR OLD GRAVEYARDS (I love snooping around in old cemeteries)
  
• GOD IS EVERYWHERE - EVEN IN NEW JERSEY (maybe this is funnier to those of us who have actually lived/done time in NJ)
  
• SAVE THE EARTH SO WE'LL STILL HAVE SOMEPLACE TO BOOGIE!
• GUN CONTROL MEANS USING BOTH HANDS (seen on a camouflage painted truck in MN)
• FRODO FAILED - BUSH GOT THE RING
• YES, THIS IS MY TRUCK. NO, I WON'T HELP YOU MOVE (a woman was the driver of this truck)
  
• IT'S TIME TO MOTHER EARTH
• MEAN PEOPLE SUCK
• WHAT IF THE HOKEY POKEY IS WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT?
• THE LAST TIME WE MIXED POLITICS AND RELIGION SOMEONE GOT BURNED AT THE STAKE
• FEMINISM IS THE RADICAL NOTION THAT WOMEN ARE PEOPLE
• UNIONS - THE PEOPLE WHO BROUGHT YOU THE WEEKEND
• SOMEWHERE IN TEXAS A VILLAGE IS MISSING THEIR IDIOT (old news, but worth repeating)
  
• GROW YOUR OWN DOPE...PLANT A MAN
• IF WAR IS THE ANSWER, WE ARE NOT ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS
• THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE NOT THINGS
• BARE FEET - NOT ARMS
• FIGHT TRUTH DECAY
• SILLY BOYS! JEEPS ARE FOR GIRLS!
• SPEAK YOUR MIND EVEN IF YOUR VOICE SHAKES
• YOU DON'T HAVE TO BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU THINK
• A DAY WITHOUT FAIRIES IS LIKE A DAY WITHOUT SUNSHINE
• CIVIL MARRIAGE IS A CIVIL RIGHT
• I LOVE MY COUNTRY BUT I THINK WE SHOULD START SEEING OTHER PEOPLE
• RUST IN PEACE (on a really old Chevy clunker)
  
• CLEVERLY DISGUISED AS A RESPONSIBLE ADULT
• MY CAT IS SMARTER THAN YOUR HONOR STUDENT
• A SMALL MIND IS A BEAUTIFUL THING TO LOSE
• BUCKLE UP - IT MAKES IT HARDER FOR THE ALIENS TO SUCK YOU OUT
• DO NOT MEDDLE IN THE AFFAIRS OF DRAGONS FOR YOU ARE CRUNCHY AND TASTE GOOD WITH KETCHUP
• PETA - PEOPLE EATING TASTY ANIMALS (I actually saw this on a truck in the parking lot of a company that produces soy-based foods!)
  

I have lived in 5 states in my lifetime. Each one has its own personality. While Massachusetts proudly wears its loyalties on its bumper stickers, I'm not sure who they're trying to impress with these road signs:

• PICKING UP OR DISCHARGING PASSENGERS PROHIBITED (ok - why can't they just say No Hitch-hiking?)
• RUBBISH DISPOSAL PROHIBITED (or - No Littering?)
• TRUCK EXITING PROHIBITED (or - No Truck Exit?)
• THICKLY SETTLED (fyi - this sign is posted as you are approaching the boundary of a town of ANY size after you have been driving in the countryside)
• LIVE PARKING ONLY - ALL OTHERS WILL BE TOWED (You're on your own with this one that we saw at a small roadside pull-out)